I’m happily married and I’m attracted to women as well I think. I find I masturbate to pictures of hot women and I’ve been having dreams that I’m masturbating a woman and waking up wet and thinking about it. What does this all mean?
This (lesbian) question was sent to us by e-mail, if you have any questions but feel uncomfortable with posting them yourself feel free to e-mail: ask@thelesbianquestion.com.
Yesterday the United States District Court for the Southern District of Florida dismissed a lawsuit brought by a woman who wasn't allowed to visit her dying same sex partner in a hospital. The woman had all the proper documents, but the hospital still denied visitation, saying that “[Miami] is in a anti-gay city in anti-gay state.”
The court's ruling is important for two reasons:
First, the decision equally affects same sex partners, heterosexual spouses, and immediate family members of hospital patients. The court said that Florida law doesn't grant hospital visitation rights to anyone. That means that a Florida hospital can legally deny the immediate family of a patient from visiting (or anyone else with proper documentation, including power of attorney). Such denial is legal even when, as in this case, the person wanting to visit has medical history information that could affect treatment.
I expect many future court decisions in “anti-gay” states to likewise broadly apply to both straight and gay couples. Increasing public support for gay relationships means that courts cannot easily discriminate outright against gay couples without public backlash. Therefore, the dismissal suggests not that gay partners have no visitation rights in “an anti-gay city in an anti-gay state,” but that nobody does.
The hospital's public statement after the court's dismissal mirrors this desire to be nondiscriminatory about what is clearly discriminatory treatment. Steve Rothaus reported the hospital's statement in the Miami Herald
We have always believed and known that the staff at Jackson treats everyone equally, and that their main concern is the well-being of the patients in their care. . . . At Jackson Health System, we believe in a culture of inclusion. For more than 90 years, the institution has taken great pride in serving everyone who enters its doors, regardless of race, creed, religious beliefs or sexual orientation. We also employ a very diverse workforce, one that mirrors the community we serve.
Second, the decision reminds gay couples everywhere that not even the best legal preparation can reliably defeat an institution determined to discriminate against them. This woman followed all the typical advice about bringing documents with her to ensure that her rights are recognized–it still didn't work.
[Cross-posted at the Gay Couples Law Blog, which discusses same sex family law, estate planning, and taxes.]
My favorite Banned Book Week quote so far:
When we ban a book about a kid on the outside, we’re taking a step toward banning the kid.
—Chris Crutcher, whose books have several times landed him on the American Library Association’s list of Top Ten Most Challenged Books (sometimes for homosexual content). He was speaking at the ALA’s Banned Books Week Read-Out on Saturday in Chicago. (As reported by Sarah Brannen, herself on the list.)
Between the horrible Florida court decision and Banned Books Week, I’ve been feeling a lot of angst this week. What better way to dispel it than a new video about peace by high-profile lesbian mom Melissa Etheridge, which she made with Pakistani musician Salman Ahmad?
They created it for Search for Common Ground, a non-profit organization that works to transform the way the world deals with conflict. The video was produced by TakePart.com, a cause-related social networking site. Find out more at http://www.takepart.com/sfcg.
No, a song by itself can’t create change. But it can inspire us to do so.
Melissa Etheridge and Salman Ahmad “Ring the Bells”
Uploaded by TakePart. – Explore more music videos.
Well um hi to all, here’s my story I guess. Well I’m 17 and I found out I was lez or bi I when I was 15. The first girl I liked was great and beautiful and all but seeing her in a different light scared the crap out of me, see for awhile even before actually figuring it out myself I guess I was always attracted to girls more than guys just admiring the beauty. But then came along this girl that twisted my world upside down at the time she was 15. I never felt anything close to what I felt for her. I was immediately attracted to her and we hit it off pretty well.
I was one of her first friends in the program we were in. We got pretty close in the first months of our friendship but after awhile I couldn’t handle being around her without wanting to attack her. So after 2 months I told her I liked her and wondered if I had any chance with her. She responded that she only wanted to be friends. That was one of the most painful moments in my short life. I was pretty down and a lil angry because wither she knew it or not she flirted wit me constantly. So we decided to stay friends but I began to distance myself away from her slowly.
Summer came around and since we were in the same program we had to spend six weeks together with 40 or so others both boys and girls at a camp. I hadn’t talked to her in over 2 weeks so I didn’t know what to expect. Bedtime came around and all the girls slept in the same room; there were bunk beds spread throughout the room I choose one close to one of my best friends who I met a year before in the program while she slept at the complete opposite side of the room than me. I was okay with that and it keeps my nerves calm. So throughout the program I avoided her a lot bout a fourth way thru she noticed and started to try to hang around me more often which, if any of u can relate, was torturous. Half way thru she decided to change beddings and come to the bed to the right of me to sleep. Needless to say the last part of camp at night was rough, but what really confused me was how she acted around me when we were alone. This one time I was running upstairs to grab something from my room and she was coming down I almost ran into her, but I got to tell u this girl was around 5′2 to my 5′7, so I stopped myself in time then looked down her light brown eyes were piercing thru mine I could actually feel her breath on my chin, her eyes were questioning as she took a tiny step forward her head tilted upward. I swear that was a very intense moment, my nerves were getting to me and I knew she was teasing me or something but some how I managed to step side ways and run up the stairs. Cant say that was the last time stuff like that happened just that was the most intense. Anyway other events happened that I don’t really want to explain but the program ended for the summer and me and her friendship was severed badly I cut it off not wanting anymore heartbreak.
I just didn’t understand why she would put me through all that and just play with my emotions. Some how she became my friend again and she still confused the hell out of me so I agreed to still be her friend though like at the beginning I distanced my self it was easier because she lived in a different town than me but the feelings would go away that told me that she liked me too cause we both liked the same things and some things not so much. I know I’m leaving out a lot but I just don’t know what to do, I don’t know how she really feels, but my question to u is should I stay her friend and see where it takes me? Or should I stop being friends before I get hurt anymore?
The difference between someone being “single” and “available” is “trouble.”
“Is she or isn’t she?” She is.
You will be successful in getting her number.
If you feel sick later, it was the tofu.
Let it go. It will save you $$ on therapy.
Keep pushing… you are making this world a better place.
Don’t be stupid: Put down the Mai Tai… and your phone.
The menu said vegan, but SURPRISE! It was cooked with fish sauce.
Fish sauce will not kill you.
Shy girls are like flowers. Nurture them and they’ll open up.
Some girls are like goldfish. Nurture them but your relationship will nevertheless die quickly.
Goldfish are pretty.
Do not be distracted by the pretty lights.
Your quick thinking will get you out of a sticky ex-tuation.
“That” ex will soon find you on Facebook. Ignore request.
Say what’s on your mind. After all, honesty is the best policy. Unless you are in the US military.
“Crazy” is relative.
You will soon be surrounded by friends and laughter at the karaoke bar.
As usual, Crooks and Liars is on top of things, pointing out what is going on over at [Engage Barbara Feldon voice] News? Maaaaaaaaxxx!
From John L. Perry at Newsmax:
There is a remote, although gaining, possibility America's military will intervene as a last resort to resolve the Obama problem. Don't dismiss it as unrealistic.
America isn't the Third World. If a military coup does occur here it will be civilized. That it has never happened doesn't mean it wont. Describing what may be afoot is not to advocate it. So, view the following through military eyes:
Did you get that? Perry doesn't advocate a military overthrow of the Obama administration, he's…just sayin'. Does anyone doubt that we'll see “military coup” signs at the next tea party?
Better question: Will they serve tea at the military coup? Or will they just provide Skoal and cups labled Pepsi but that look suspiciously not like Pepsi?
The latter of course.
'Cuz that would be civvul-ized.
This Thursday’s Senate Judiciary Committee hearing marking up the Leahy PATRIOT Act extension bill is the best chance yet for significant reform. As well as limiting the use of sneak-and-peak warrants and National Security Letters, it bars “bulk collection” under FISA and holds telecom companies accountable for past abuses. A broad coalition including EFF, the ACLU, Bill of Rights Defense Committee, the American Library association and many other organizations support Senator Feingold’s JUSTICE Act, a comprehensive package of reforms. The key question for Thursday is how many will be added to Leahy’s more limited bill.
Over the next two days, we need to pressure Democrats on the SJC to add provisions from the JUSTICE Act during markup — and Senators to sign on as co-sponsors to the JUSTICE Act.
Here’s how you can help:
On Twitter: tweet the link to this post. Then follow the action on the #patriotact hashtag and retweet early and often! Here’s three tweets to start you out:
Our best chance yet to fix the #PatriotAct and FISA. Support the Justice Act! http://bit.ly/justiceact Pls RT
@SenArlenSpecter Support the JUSTICE Act! Fix the #patriotact and FISA http://act.ly/ln (please RT)
Call @SenArlenSpecter at (202) 224-4254 and ask him to Support the JUSTICE Act!
On Facebook: share this link in your feed, and join the PASS the JUSTICE Act group.
On the phone: call your Senators and ask them to support the JUSTICE Act. You can find our talking points here.
On the web: CREDO Action, ACLU, EFF and DownSizeDC all have sites which make it easy to email your Senators.
If you blog: repost these instructions
For more information, see
The coaltion letter in Support of the JUSTICE Act
EFF and the ACLU’s endorcements
Julian Sanchez’ preliminary assessment of the two bills.
Senator Feingold’s JUSTICE Act announcement, and the
Posts fromMarcy Wheeler on FireDogLake.com and Julian Sanchez on CATO@Liberty
Senator Russ Feingold questioning the Justice Department on the PATRIOT Act
This Thursday’s Senate Judiciary Committee markup of the Leahy PATRIOT Act reauthorization bill is the best chance yet for significant reform. As well as limiting the use of sneak-and-peak warrants and National Security Letters, it bars “bulk collection” under FISA and holds telecom companies accountable for past abuses. A broad coalition including EFF, the ACLU, Bill of Rights Defense Committee, the American Library association and many other organizations support Senator Feingold’s JUSTICE Act, a comprehensive package of reforms. The key question for Thursday is how many will be added to Leahy’s more limited bill.
Over the next two days, we need to pressure Democrats on the SJC to add provisions from the JUSTICE Act during markup — and Senators to sign on as co-sponsors to the JUSTICE Act.
Here’s how you can help:
On Twitter: tweet the link to this post. Then follow the action on the #patriotact hashtag and retweet early and often! Here’s three tweets to start you out:
Tomorrow’s our best chance to fix the #PatriotAct and FISA. Help support the Justice Act! http://bit.ly/3q8MOm Pls RT
@SenArlenSpecter Support the JUSTICE Act! Fix the #patriotact and FISA http://act.ly/ln (please RT)
Call @SenArlenSpecter at (202) 224-4254 and ask him to Support the JUSTICE Act!
On Facebook: share this link in your feed, and join the PASS the JUSTICE Act group.
On the phone: call your Senators and ask them to support the JUSTICE Act. You can find our talking points here.
On the web: CREDO Action, ACLU, EFF and DownSizeDC all have sites which make it easy to email your Senators.
If you blog: repost these instructions
For more information, see
The coaltion letter in Support of the JUSTICE Act
EFF and the ACLU’s endorcements
Julian Sanchez’ preliminary assessment of the two bills.
Senator Feingold’s JUSTICE Act announcement, and the
Posts fromMarcy Wheeler on FireDogLake.com and Julian Sanchez on CATO@Liberty
Senator Russ Feingold questioning the Justice Department on the PATRIOT Act
This Thursday’s Senate Judiciary Committee markup of the Leahy PATRIOT Act reauthorization bill is the best chance yet for significant reform. As well as limiting the use of sneak-and-peak warrants and National Security Letters, it bars “bulk collection” under FISA and holds telecom companies accountable for past abuses. A broad coalition including EFF, the ACLU, Bill of Rights Defense Committee, the American Library association and many other organizations support Senator Feingold’s JUSTICE Act, a comprehensive package of reforms. The key question for Thursday is how many will be added to Leahy’s more limited bill.
Over the next two days, we need to pressure Democrats on the SJC to add provisions from the JUSTICE Act during markup — and Senators to sign on as co-sponsors to the JUSTICE Act.
Here’s how you can help:
Senator Russ Feingold questioning the Justice Department on the PATRIOT Act
On Twitter: tweet the link to this post. Then follow the action on the #patriotact hashtag and retweet early and often! Here’s three tweets to start you out:
Tomorrow’s our best chance to fix the #PatriotAct & FISA. Tell your Sens to support the Justice Act http://bit.ly/3q8MOm Pls RT
@SenArlenSpecter Support the JUSTICE Act! Fix the #patriotact and FISA http://act.ly/ln (please RT)
Call @SenArlenSpecter at (202) 224-4254 and ask him to Support the JUSTICE Act!
On Facebook: share this link in your feed, and join the PASS the JUSTICE Act group.
On the phone: call your Senators and ask them to support the JUSTICE Act. You can find our talking points here.
On the web: ACLU, EFF, DownSizeDC, and CREDO Action all have sites which make it easy to email your Senators.
If you blog: repost these instructions
For more information, see
The coaltion letter in Support of the JUSTICE Act
EFF and the ACLU’s endorcements
Julian Sanchez’ preliminary assessment of the two bills.
Senator Feingold’s JUSTICE Act announcement, and the
Posts fromMarcy Wheeler on FireDogLake.com and Julian Sanchez on CATO@Liberty